A child of divorce

Happily I figured out that that idea was crazy. That was a really tough thing to come to grips with. I almost married the wrong person (who is a good guy and we're friends now, but we weren't right for each other). We called off our wedding about 3 days before the ceremony.

I finally figured out that I wanted to go into a marriage thinking that this was going to be my only marriage.

At some point when I was growing up, I was able to realize how much happier both of my parents seemed with their new partners (even at a young age you recognize tension and unhappiness even if you're not totally sure what it is) and be happy about it. Sure at first, I was angry with my dad. (I am told that I told people at school that I didn't have a father. Sorry Dad!) But he and I have a wonderfully close relationship now. And even though I'm not close to my stepfather's children, I still wonder what's going on in their lives and send them cards at the holidays. I'm closer to my stepmom's son and we swap email on a somewhat regular basis.

Where am I going with all this?

I think that the right people can bring kids from separate relationships together and make it work.

Yeah, it probably really sucks to be the stepparent in the beginning, but my stepmom (and my stepfather) showed me (I won't speak for my brother) that with love and not trying to compete with my mother for the title of "Mom" that "Stepmom" is an equally wonderful title.

And now I have 4 parents and a zillion (ok, 6) siblings which is fine by me!